


The Secret of Kurt Hummel

by poodleskirt



Series: Kurt the Obvious Vampire [1]
Category: Glee
Genre: Gen, Vampire AU, blood mention, halloween fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-10-31
Updated: 2014-10-31
Packaged: 2018-02-23 08:38:26
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 7,689
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2541323
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/poodleskirt/pseuds/poodleskirt
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>His secret is that he's a vampire.</p><p>And Rachel was going to prove it.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Research

The start of senior year, Rachel didn’t have time to worry about new transfer students. Honestly, she had much bigger fish to fry. On top of classes, she had the clubs she was a member of, and the ones she was president of. On top of that, New Directions was a whole other basket of responsibilities. So if a new student decided to move to Lima, Ohio, to finish his final year of high school, then what did she care?

And if a couple of jocks were appearing dead, blood drained, she really didn’t have the time to think about it.

It was only when he auditioned for Glee Club that he appeared on her radar. It wasn’t because of his, well, _lady fabulous_ ways. It was because of his voice, and how unique it was, except, well… _not_.

She didn’t know how to explain it except that she received a strong sense of déjà vu when she listened to his audition, which was ridiculous because when could she have heard his voice before?

It wasn’t until she was doing her Weekly Broadway Classic Re-Watch (which the other glee girls _still_ refused their invitation for) when she finally made the connection. It was an absurd connection, a connection that couldn’t really mean anything, but a connection nonetheless.

His voice reminded her of the voice of the one Thomas Amsel, a Broadway Legend (ish). No not reminded. It _was_ the voice of Thomas Amsel, and it was no wonder that Rachel couldn’t place him right away. Even with her admittedly extensive knowledge of all things Broadway, Thomas Amsel was a ghost among most. He was only on the stage for three years before he disappeared completely. He had starred in only one production, _Transylvanian Fiend_ , but it had made enough of an impact that one of his songs was saved on Rachel's iPod, which was an honor in itself.

There was just one problem. The production _Transylvanian Fiend_ that Amsel starred in, played in _1928_. So any hopes that a secret Broadway Star was walking the halls of McKinley were quickly dashed. Kurt would have to be like, _a hundred._ Right now, he barely looked legal enough to vote. 

Rachel quickly scrolled down to Thomas' song and hit play. It was an old recording, but you could hear his voice well enough. And like she suspected, the voice was remarkably alike to Kurt Hummel. She squinted, listening for any kind of differences from what she remembered to be Kurt's voice.

Rachel frowned. That was strange. There was not a single note she found to be different. Pitch, tone, everything, was the same. If she didn't know any better, she'd say that Kurt Hummel _was_ Thomas Amsel.

Well, this would require some research. 

/\/\/\/\/\

 

“Fellow Glee Clubbers, I brought you here this morning to discuss something incredibly serious,” Rachel told her peers as they stood around the piano. Mercedes rolled her eyes.

“It best be 'incredibly serious', I had to wake up an hour earlier for this.” The others made noises of agreement, all of them extremely groggy and just waiting for this meeting to end, if only to squeeze a quick nap in before first period.

Rachel shook her head. “Why does no one follow the strict diet, exercise, and sleep habits that I posted in the MySpace group? You wouldn't feel so sleep-deprived if you were to follow it. Look at me!”

“Becoming you is about the opposite of anything I've ever wanted,” Quinn said in a dead voice. She did not like to have her beauty rest infringed on.

“Oh my god, can we can get this over with? I can feel myself getting hives by standing in a room of losers so early in the morning” Santana said impatiently.

“Trust me, this is worth it!” Rachel fixed each member with a very serious look, which took a while, but she felt it was worth it to bring drama to the situation. “I've been doing extensive research, and I've come to the conclusion that Kurt Hummel is...”

She waited an obligatory five seconds, for the perfect dramatic pause.

“A _vampire_!”

“Oh Jesus.” Mercedes whispered. The others echoed her with similar expressions of exasperation.

“ _This_ is what I woke up early for?”

“I can understand your hesitation! If you'll all simply wait until you hear the evidence I have compiled-everyone gets their own [folder](http://larkofthesky.tumblr.com/post/101431913345/kurt-hummel)\- you will be as convinced as I am!” Rachel said as she passed along the folders of 'evidence'.

“I'm quitting and joining chess club,” Artie muttered miserably, grabbing his own folder. “Chess club don't deal with this shit.”

Satisfied that everyone had their own folder, Rachel began.

“Now if you'll all turn to the fourth page.” Rachel conducted. Wanting this to finish as fast as possible, the choir room was filled with the sound of pages turning dutifully.

Past the first three pages, which were filled with the table of contents and poorly photoshopped pictures of Kurt's face over vampire stock pictures, were actual biographies of random men throughout the past century or so, along with blurry pictures of celebrities and people around them.

“Who the hell is Thomas Amsel?” Santana asked, squinting at the biography.

“I'm glad you asked, Santana! Mr. Amsel was on Broadway for a few short years, and happens to look exactly like a certain _Kurt Hummel_! Look at the pictures! He even sounds like him! Here, listen!” Rachel insisted, thrusting her iPod into Mike's hand, who caught it in fear.

“This looks nothing like him,”

“He would never wear that scarf,” Mercedes said easily. “Too boring.”

Rachel huffed. “Kurt _would_ wear that scarf because he _did_ wear that scarf.”

The club all looked at her in concern.

“Are you really serious here Berry? Because Hummel is _not_ a vampire.” Puck said. “Tina! Tell Crazy here that Kurt's not a vampire. You know all about that kind of stuff.”

Tina huffed. “You pretend to be the Asian Vampire King's daughter _one time_ and no one ever forgets.”

Everyone starred at her blankly. Tina looked at them all before finally breaking.

“Ok _fine_. I seriously doubt Kurt is a vampire.”

“ _Tina!_ ” Rachel cried, feeling very betrayed.

“Sorry Rachel,” Tina said with a shrug. “But these guys are right, Kurt is human. I've seen him stand in sunlight with my own eyes, and he didn’t explode. Trust me. I've watched _Buffy_ , like, ten times."

“I think I can explain all of this,” Sam said seriously, who had been suspiciously silent until now. “Clearly, Kurt is... _The Doctor_.”

“I seriously doubt he's ever attended medical school,” Brittany replied thoughtfully.

“No Britt, like _The Doctor_ Doctor. Like TARDIS and bow ties Doctor. That would explain why he keeps showing up in the past at important dates and times.” Sam said.

“Dude! That totally makes sense! Hummel is totally the type to use something as cool as the TARDIS to hang out at lame parties,” Puck said energetically.

Rachel was frustrated with the way this meeting was going. Of course, she expected some hesitation at first, but she thought she would have managed to convince her teammates by now. She was going to have to work harder.

“If you were to simply look at the next couple of pages, you'll see pictures that are undeniable-”

“I can't see Kurt as the Doctor,” Artie said with a frown. “Like, would he have had a thing with Rose?”

“Naw man, he's like a new dude every time. So like, he was into her one life and into dudes the next,” Sam explained easily.

“ _Chorra_! The Doctor always loves Rose, no matter what life!” Santana said passionately, with tears in her eyes. 

“So would that mean that Kurt is the Twelfth Doctor? Damn, that's heavy.” Tina said with wide eyes.

“Where do you think he's hiding the TARDIS?” Artie asked, now convinced of the theory.

“In the ocean!” Brittany said happily, not sure what they were talking about.

“Has anyone seen any telephone booths?” Sam asked loudly.

“Dude I totally saw one! Does it count if it has glass doors?” Puck asked.

“EVERYONE. PLEASE.” Rachel yelled, putting her vocal cords to use.

Everyone stared at her, their mouths clamped shut in shock. She cleared her throat. She would have to drink some lemon water as soon as this meeting was over, but right now she had more important tasks at hand.

“Kurt Hummel is a vampire, I know it. Now if you'll all _please_ just go through the package I have assembled, you'll see as well.”

Not wanting to be yelled at again, they flipped through the dossier.

Quinn frowned at a picture. “This looks so fake. You can literally see where you photoshopped it.”

To Rachel's dismay, they all made sounds of agreements.

“Ok, that's creepy.” Puck stated. He was looking down at a particularly convincing picture.

“What's creepy?”

The group gasped and turned to the door to see Kurt standing at the door, with a creepy smile.

A smile covered in what had to be _blood_.

Rachel gestured at him and his red mouth. “See!” She said.

“Dude what's that around your mouth?” Finn asked nervously.

“Oh this?” Kurt said, smile still in place. He took out a handkerchief and started to wipe his mouth. “It must be the leftovers of the Titan's welcome gift. I thought I got it all.”

Mercedes gasped sympathetically. “You were slushied! Poor baby!”

“That is _not_ the consistency of a slushie! I would know!” Rachel said in disbelief, looking around at the other members, then back to Kurt. “And how would you have even missed that much?” She was ignored however as Mercedes and Quinn moved to help clean him off.

“Hey Kurt” Sam said casually. “Been to any different time periods recently?”

Kurt looked at him oddly. “Not that I recall,” he answered, just as casually.

Rachel looked at all of her teammates in dismay. Her mission had failed, and all her friends were still blind to the danger of Kurt Hummel. She would have to prove this one alone.

 

/\/\/\/\/\/\

 

She started off slow at first. During Glee Club, she would engage Kurt in conversations about Twilight to see what his reaction would be to vampires. His answer was not one she hoped for when he easily proclaimed that he was “Team Jacob!” but she could work around it.

Next, she bought him lunch. It was pizza, with hefty toppings of garlic. Kurt looked shocked that she had bought him anything, considering the last time they had had a conversation was when they were discussing Twilight and she had left midway, looking furious.

“Please Kurt, I consider you a great friend!” Rachel said in response to his confusion.

“We've known each other for like, a week.” Kurt said with a frown.

“Just eat the pizza.”

Kurt shrugged, and was lifting the slice to his mouth before he sniffed it and dropped in horror.

“Is that garlic?” Kurt asked.

“What's wrong? Can't eat it?” Rachel asked, smiling in victory. She had her proof.

“No it's just—I really hate garlic. It gives me terrible breath, and I feel like I can't get rid of it for days” Kurt said easily.

“I have breath mints!” Rachel said, already feeling her self deflate.

“Really Rachel, I'm fine. Thanks anyways.” Pushing the pizza away, Kurt walked back to the cafeteria line. Rachel watched him with distress. This would be harder then she thought. 

It seemed like the more she tried the less evidence she had, and the more convinced she got. At this point, she felt insulted more than anything, because he wasn't even being _subtle_. When the group had gone to their favourite frozen yogurt store after rehearsal (they were introduced to it by those coupons Figgins had given them after their hot mess of an Alcohol Awareness performance), Kurt mentioned something that his “friend, Marilyn” said.

Which is really just insulting, because in her dossier of evidence there is literally a _picture_ of him and Marilyn Monroe chatting at a party. _Page 5_! Did he _want_ to be found out as a terrifying blood-sucking monster of the night? Was he _trying_ to throw his disguise as a normal human away? If not, he must just think they're plain stupid, because who's even named Marilyn in today's society anyways?

And then there were the fights he had with the history teacher, claiming certain aspects of the class to be “inaccurate.” Things he couldn't have known unless he had actually been there. Yet when she brought this subject up to light with her peers, it simply reinforced their theory of Kurt being a mystical time traveller. Which was still a terrible theory and she would prove it by being right about her own theory.

She was Rachel Berry, dammit. Her resume was longer than any one else she knew, and she'd be damned if she was proven wrong by a couple of Doctor Who enthusiasts. If she could star in her first production at only 4 months old, she could do this.

/\/\/\/\/\/\

 

Rachel rang the doorbell and waited. While she waited, she looked around her surroundings, taking in the potted plants lining the porch, with a garden in front of it, and a charming walkway leading to the sidewalk. You would never know this was the home of a blood-sucking monster.

The door swung open, with Kurt standing there looking confused. “Uh, Rachel? What are you doing at my house?” Rachel smiled.

“Hello Kurt,” she said, walking into his house without invitation. “I just wanted to chat. Hang out. You know, friend stuff.”

She was also going to snoop through his stuff, but he needn't know about that.

Kurt gave her an odd look.

“Um, OK. I'm about to watch _Singing in the Rain_ , if you'd like to join me.”

Rachel brightened. “I'll make the popcorn!”

/\/\/\/\/\/\

 

An hour and a half later, with the credits rolling, Rachel looked away from the screen and came back to reality. Darn it. She hadn't meant to get so engrossed into the film, yet now here she was, blinking away tears that had arisen as Gene Kelly and Debbie Reynolds sang their last note in their stunning duet.

Oh my god, what if Kurt knew Debbie Reynolds? _What if he knew Gene Kelly?_

Which brought her to her original mission of snooping.

“Well,” Rachel said as she stood up, stretching her arms up. “I need to use the lady's room, so if you'll excuse me.”

She didn’t wait for a response before she started running up to the second floor, which apart from the bathroom also held the _bedrooms_. Specifically the bedroom of a certain evil creature who was raised from the depths of hell.

Peeking through each door, she finally opened the door of the complete opposite of what she'd take a vampire's room to be, and definitely the polar opposite of a teenage boy's room. Which so far, meant that it was Kurt’s. (Which really just proves his evil vampire ways more, in a way.)

The room was sterile white, full of uncomfortable white chairs that looked like cages. It also had a huge bed, which she wouldn't expect to be in the room of a teenage boy, nor a vampire. Rachel huffed. Just this once, Kurt couldn't make it easy on her? He couldn't just sleep in a coffin or something?

Squaring her shoulders, she got to work. All bookshelves were to be checked, which should be simple, as he seemed to have a _flawless_ filing system. Under the bed, in the drawers, she would check it all. Or as much as she would before Kurt got suspicious and would come up to check on her.

But frustratingly enough, on top of the lack of coffin, there was also no blood supplies, creepy old spell books, or any other stuff that she would think vampires own. The most she got was a couple of muscle magazines under the bed, which, _ew_.

Admitting defeat, at least for this fight, she made her way out of the room, making sure that she had left all the stuff in Kurt's room the way she found it. Shutting the door quietly behind her, Rachel made her way slowly back to the Hummel's living room where Kurt would be waiting for her.

She frowned. So far, the only signs of Kurt being a vampire have all been completely debatable. She couldn't have been wrong, could she? Kurt being a vampire made so much sense. Except, well, Kurt had been nothing but kind to her and had even let her in his house, and really—Wait.

What the hell was that? Rachel quickly took two steps back, and looked at a piece of black fabric that was hanging on the wall. And if Rachel looked a little closer, she could see that the fabric was covering some kind of a frame.

Heart beating wildly in her chest, she slowly grasped the fabric and tugged it aside. And before was the most incriminating piece of evidence against Kurt so far. Staring back at her was her very own face, smiling maddeningly.

 

/\/\/\/\/\/\

 

“Vampire! Hey vampire!” Rachel yelled, running down the stairs. “Evil undead mosquito!” 

“Uh. Rachel?” Kurt asked, looking up as Rachel quickly ran into the room. “Why are you yelling about vampires?”

“Because, vampire, I know what you are, and that is a vampire.” Rachel pronounced confidently.

Kurt blinked. “I'm sorry?”

“You're a vampire. A monster! And I have proof!”

Kurt slowly stood up, “Rachel? Are you OK? Do you want me to drive you home?"

She leaped back in horror, “Stay away, cruel beast!” She quickly pulled a necklace that had been hiding under her shirt. It was a simple charm of a silver cross, with a silver chain to match. “You can not touch me, for I carry the sign of God, although I personally prefer David's Star.”

“What are you talking about Rachel? Signs of God? Vampires?” Kurt raised his arm in a calming matter, slowly walking towards her. “Maybe you should just rest for a minute.”

“Don't act like you don't know what I'm talking about, Human Imposter! I saw the mirror!” Rachel yelled, still holding up her cross.

“Mirror? What mirror?” Kurt asked with a frown, freezing in spot.

“The mirror upstairs! The one covered in fabric! What's the matter- don't want anyone to know you don't have a reflection?” Rachel asked. She smiled, knowing she finally had him.

Slowly, a smile started to spread across his face. “You saw that, did you?”

And instead of cowering before as she had hoped, he began to walk towards again. She raised the cross higher, but her shaking hand betrayed her false bravado.

“Stay back!” She yelled, but he still walked, until he stood right in front of her. Slowly, he raised his hand, and wrapped his hand around the cross and brought it back down.

Rachel gasped in horror. Not only did the cross not burn him, it didn't even seem to affect him! Her only piece of defence she had brought with her proved useless, and now she was vulnerable against this monster. How would she ever escape.

They stared at each other for what felt like hours, but what must have been only minutes, with Rachel shaking from head to toe, and Kurt continuing his creepy smile.

“If you try to eat me, my dads will set up a huge searching party when I don't come home! You'll have to leave town!”

Kurt slowly tilted his head, smile still in place. Finally, after a minute more of staring, he slowly stepped back and frowned, letting go of her necklace. She suddenly felt as if she could breath again.

“Although I haven't the _slightest_ idea what you're talking about, if I _were_ a vampire, I would tell you that all the myths you know of their weaknesses are probably false, including crosses.”

Kurt smiled once again. “You should go, I wouldn't want you to be late coming home. Who knows what's out there in the dark?”

Although it bothered her, she knew that she had to leave whether she liked it or not. She quickly made her way to the front door, Kurt following all the way. She opened the door and stepped out on to the porch, before looking back at him once more, confused.

“Why would you let me go? I know your secret now.” She wasn't sure what brought her to say that, but as soon as the words left her mouth she knew she had to know the answer. Kurt smiled at her, apparently amused.

“Dear Rachel, who would ever believe you?” And with that, he promptly shut the door, leaving a shocked and distraught Rachel behind.

Looking at the door for a few more minutes, she figured she was no use to anyone standing here. She made her way quickly off the Hummel's property, and began to walk home, her mind working at a furious speed.

She was so sure she had him, so sure she would be able to unveil his true identity to Glee Club. But the last thing he said struck her, because she hadn't thought about it. Who _would_ believe her story? They didn't before, why would they now? He may have practically spelled it out to her, but she had no witnesses. No undeniable proof.

So she was back to square one, except even worse than before. Because now she knew what defences that she thought could be used to save her friends, to protect them, were now useless. He said crosses didn't work on him, but what else? What would stakes do, or even direct sunlight?

She would have to find out, but first, some more research was necessary.

/\/\/\/\/\/\

 

Rachel walked in to McKinley's library. She had come here for a reason. She had scoured the Internet already, but all the weaknesses she found for destroying Kurt were always the same: crosses, stakes to the heart, or sunlight. And if she knew that the first one didn’t work, then she decided she could no longer trust mainstream vampire lore. No, for this she would have to go deeper.

Hence, the library.

Of course Rachel was no stranger to this place. Granted, she was more familiar with the musical theater section, and less so with the… supernatural section. But she felt confident enough to stride up to the shelves holding a promising “Werewolves, Vampires, and Other Spooky Creatures!” sign on top. Apparently, the librarian was excited for Halloween, which was not exactly coming up, but Rachel could appreciate any passion, be it for theater or holidays.

Grabbing the first book that had vampire in the title, Rachel claimed a spot at the tables and sat to read. After a half hour, she got back up, grabbed another book, and sat back down again. And again. And again. And again, until the pile that surrounded her on the table held every book that even mentioned the supernatural.

Rachel huffed. Two hours had passed, the library was closing, and she hadn’t found a single mention of vampire’s weaknesses that weren’t already mentioned in Twilight. Ugh. This was why she invested so much time in her MySpace account. Books were useless.

She stood up and began to make her way out of the library. She’ll just have to find another way. She figured if worst comes to worst, she would just throw some garlic at Kurt and pray that the biography film they’ll make based on her death wins all the Oscars it deserves.

She was almost at the door when she realized that some one was whispering to her.

“ _Psst! Psst!_ ”

Looking around, the only person she saw left in the library was the librarian, Ms. Teller. But why would she--?

 _“Psst!_ ”  Ms. Teller whispered, looking straight at her. She started gesturing for Rachel to come closer, which Rachel did warily. Before today, the only time the older woman ever talked to Rachel was to tell her to stop doing her vocal trainings in the library because it was causing a “disruption”.

“Can I help you?” Rachel whispered, terrified of raising her voice any higher.

“I noticed you looking into some interesting literature, dearie…” The librarian whispered in a terrifying manner, and ok, wow, she knows what she’s going to be talking to her therapist about this week.

“And…?”

“And if you want to learn more about the undead, that’s not where you’ll find it!”

Rachel stared at her in shock, wondering if she heard her right.

“What do you…?”

“Vampires, young lady! Vampires! I don’t put the real stuff on display! The only books you’ll find there are those shiny-fairy boys!”

 “Are you talking about Twilight?” Rachel frowned. “Because I think that if you’d watch the movie you’d enjoy the franchise a lot more- Pattison adds a lot of depth!”

“Focus, child! Focus! If you’re serious about learning about these creatures, I would suggest…” She rummaged under her desk, before pulling out a large and dusty book. “This!”

Placing the book on the desk, Rachel looked at the title. Across the cover was the word “VAMPYR” written in creepy letters, surrounded by gold embellishments. Whatever it was, it looked old.

“‘Vampyr’? I’ve never heard of it. Who’s the author?” Rachel asked.

“This book is centuries old, dear! It doesn’t matter who wrote it-only that it’s the best thing we have against vampires! It contains the history of them, what their weaknesses are, even how to kill them!”

Rachel gasped. This book was exactly what she needed!

“How much?” She demanded.

Ms. Teller blinked. “You don’t have to…”

Rachel glared. Ms. Teller sighed.

“That’ll be fifty bucks.”

Rachel brightened. She was amazing at haggling!

After exchanging her birthday money for the book, Rachel was about to leave before she stopped at the door, and looked back at the librarian. It occurred to her that it would be in her best interest to have a partner if she was really going try and defeat Kurt.

“Ms. Teller?”

“Yes, dear?”

“What do you think of the new student, Kurt Hummel?”

The women suddenly smiled. “Oh I think he’s adorable! He came in here just the other week with some of his friends and sang us a little song, isn’t that sweet? I really do hope they’ll come and sing at my Sunday service!"

Rachel rolled her eyes. Of course. “Have a nice night, Ms. Teller,”

“You as well, dear.” The librarian replied, already looking back down at her desk.

Back at home with her bedroom door locked she pulled the ancient book out of her bag. She stared at it, suddenly nervous. Inside were the answers to all the questions she had posed over the last two weeks. Inside was the answer on how to kill Kurt.

She did her best to ignore the sudden feeling of nausea that came over her at the thought, and flipped open the book. 


	2. Execution

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is the last half of it! I hope you guys enjoy and all that.

Kurt was walking down the parking lot, shades on and coat collar popped up. He looked like a classic monster pulled directly from the old movies, and yet no one even batted an eye. Rachel huffed. People really were blind here in Ohio. 

“Kurt, hey Kurt!” Rachel yelled, pulling her rolling suitcase behind her. The boy in question stopped and waited for her. When she finally made it to his side, he started walking towards school again, this time with Rachel by his side.

“You know Rachel, I’m surprised. I assumed you wouldn’t talk to me after our little… chat,”

“Well Kurt, even though you are blood-sucking creature of the night,”

“Never confirmed” Kurt interrupted happily.

“But,” Rachel pressed on firmly. “That doesn’t mean we can’t be friends.”

Kurt gave her a suspicious look (she thinks anyway, she couldn’t tell past the glasses). “No I suppose not.”

“Well then! How about we go see a movie tonight!” Rachel suggested brightly, opening the main door to school.

“Sure… what were you thinking?”

“ _Abraham Lincoln: The Vampire Slayer,_ ” she said casually before turning away from his shocked face and started walking to class. While she was making her way, she smiled, because now she had a plan.

/\/\/\/\/\/\

 

The book had revealed a lot to Rachel. For example, she learned that vampires are not especially sensitive to the sun, no more then humans. It explained how the myth had emerged from a vampire getting sunburnt and complaining to a human, who had then stretched the truth on their own retelling. From there the story had become so repeated and over-told that it practically became fact. So if Kurt always seemed to walk in shadows and avoid the sun when possible, she figured it was because if his incredibly pale complexion, not because he would turn to dust.

She also learned that crosses had to actually be _blessed_ to work, and could only be blessed by monks living in some kind of a mountain or other. The point was, being blessed by a Lima Priest wouldn’t cut it, and so Rachel was a little out of luck on that one.

However there was one fact that she found particularly interesting, and was something she would need the movie theater for. Hence, Abraham Lincoln.

They met outside of the theater, and then decided that Kurt would buy the tickets and Rachel would handle snacks. Well Rachel decided, but that didn’t really matter. They made their way into the theater, and because her plan wasn’t officially in action yet, Rachel started talking about Glee club. 

“We’re an incredibly inexperienced group—well my teammates are—so the fact that we reached Nationals at all is incredible. Although it has been argued that Finn and I choosing that moment to reconcile in a dramatic embrace might have been the reason we didn’t place, I would like to point out that even getting there was an achievement. And really, where would they be without their co-captains? I think we deserved that moment, no matter what a certain cigar-smoking girl may think.” She finished her rant, glaring off to nothing. She blinked, and looked back to Kurt who was staring at her incredibly confused. “What?”

“Nothing, it’s just- I guess you had to be there, huh?” Kurt asked a smile beginning to form. Rachel felt herself smile back.

“Exactly!”

They settled into their seats and got ready for the movie.

/\/\/\/\/\/\

 

“Actually, I haven’t had the best luck with shooting irons… _but I was a rail splitter_.” Benjamin Walker told Dominic Cooper dramatically, and as the music swelled, she felt Kurt shuffle next to her.

“I can’t believe they got that right.” She heard Kurt mutter to himself. She looked over and raised an eyebrow.

“The costumes,” he clarified, leaning closer with a wide smile. “They’re very accurate to the time period.”

“And how would you know that?” Rachel whispered back. A man behind them shushed them very loudly, but the two were too involved in their game to notice.

“You could say I’m a bit of Fashion History buff,”

“Mmhmm. So you wouldn’t know if President Lincoln was actually a vampire slayer?”

“I’d have no idea,”

“Oh my god, _shut up_ ,” the man from behind muttered angrily. They both turned back and glared at him.

“Will you hush?” Rachel said right back.

“Yeah some of us are trying to watch a movie,” Kurt finished. The man threw up his arms in exasperation.

“Some people can be so rude,” Kurt muttered to her, loud enough for the man to hear, as Rachel muffled her laughter.

 

/\/\/\/\/\/\

 

The movie over, together they made their way home, and Rachel began to put her plan in motion. Insisting that her home was closer (though it wasn’t), Rachel asked Kurt to accompany her back to her house. This of course would not have been much of a plan, if they had walked in the right direction. Rachel’s plan, however, involved taking a very different route, and would take much longer to walk. Kurt, having only moved into town less than three weeks ago, did not take in to account their strange path until they were half an hour into the walk. 

“Are you sure we’re walking the right way? This feels a lot more _country_ then usual.”

“Don’t worry Kurt, this is a shortcut!” Rachel said easily.

“Some shortcut.”

Rachel quickly distracted his worrying by striking up a question about the costuming choices used in the movie.

They were still discussing the finer points of daytime versus evening bodices, having what was probably too good of a time, before Rachel suddenly spotted something down the street- a concrete bridge. Just like the river below the bridge, the plan that had almost slipped her mind came rushing back to her.

It was the Ottawa River, the closest thing to scenery in Lima, and it seemed Kurt must have noticed it as well, if the fact that he froze in spot was anything to go by.

“Do we… are we passing the bridge?” Kurt asked. It was the closest to nervous she’d ever heard him.

“Yes, my house is past it, down a street.” That was quite the lie, as she lived nowhere near this bridge. She only knew about it because growing up in Lima, you tend to learn every bit geography of the place, if only for the shear lack of places to remember.

But Kurt did not know about any of this, and she felt a little guilty about how easy it was to abuse his trust. She took a deep breath, because suddenly she started feeling a deep set of nerves because of what she was about to do, and what it meant.

She started walking across the bridge. When she made it to the end of the bridge, she turned back to see Kurt still standing at the beginning of it.

“Kurt?” She called.

Kurt, who had been staring at the bridge, looked up at her. “I-I can’t.”

Rachel nodded, understanding. It was all part of her plan, after all. “Because vampires can’t cross running water.”

Kurt only looked mildly shocked when he heard her repeat the fact. He nodded casually. “Where did you find that out—it’s not exactly well known.”

Without a word, Rachel reached into her oversized bag and pulled out the massive book, _Vampyr_ , displaying the cover for Kurt to see.

“Ah,” Kurt finally said.

It was why she had brought him here. To confirm that what was in this book was true, and that she could use it to finally put an end to Kurt. And now it was confirmed. The book was real. And her great plan could be fully put into motion. The idea worsened the longer she stood there, the length of the bridge making the distance between the two all the more real.

The silence stretched for more then a couple of minutes, as both parties realized what this book meant. While Kurt was trying to accept that this would be the end of him, Rachel was dealing with the idea that this meant the end to their very new, very fragile, friendship.

She started talking, if only to block out the sound of the constant rushing water below her. “Look Kurt, I hope you don’t take this personally, but I had to do _something_. I mean you’re a _vampire_! I had to protect my family-my friends! You’re dangerous! I had to do something. I had to…”

“It’s fine, Rachel,” Kurt’s smile was bittersweet.

He gave a great sigh. “I guess this is the end then?”

“The end?"

“Well, I’ve never actually seen the book, but I’ve heard plenty of rumors. Aren’t there at least six different ways to kill vampires in there?” It was the first time he had addressed himself as such, and it was almost as jarring as the rest of his sentence.

“Seven,” Rachel corrected, too shocked to stop herself.

“Well then I’m sure you’ll be using at least one of these tactics to put me down. After all, you wouldn’t want me hurting your family, or anything of the other things you mentioned,”

“I know you wouldn’t…” Rachel tried to say, but was interrupted by Kurt who was getting more furious by the second.

“No really, it’s fine, because I’m a _vampire_. A monster. I wouldn’t be able to control my blood lust, and if it gets out of hand, nay, _when_ it gets out of hand, surely the loved ones of my friends are the first ones I would target.”

“Kurt, I don’t think…”

“So what will it be, huh? Do you have any ash tree in that ridiculous bag of yours?”

“No I wouldn’t…”

“ _Well?_ ”

They stared at each other, and the silence that fell was the coldest yet.

Rachel was for once at a complete loss for words, as she slowly lowered the book back into her bag. She never hated it more.

He laughed in disbelief. “Well, when you feel like killing me off, you can find me at my home. I hope you find your way back fine,”

And without another word, he turned on his heel and walked away.

/\/\/\/\/\/\

 

Three days later, Rachel still hadn’t been able to talk to Kurt. This was increasingly infuriating, especially for someone like Rachel, who _always_ found a way to talk to someone, whether they liked it or not. Kurt however managed to avoid any kind of interaction with the girl. She didn’t know if this had to do with his superhuman powers, or simply a sign of how offended he was, but either way she knew she would have to work a lot harder to make any kind of conversation with the boy.

And even if she somehow got a minute with him, what was she going to say? The last time they spoke, she insulted him, his species, and suggested terrible things that she didn’t even _believe_ , but said anyway in the spur of the moment. A week ago, she was sure that the only thing she wanted was to have no threat to her family and her friends. In her mind, that meant no Kurt. How she was going to go about it, she hadn’t been sure.

She had never really considered murder, just, well, stopping him. But what would she be stopping? Up to this point, the only victims she would assume to be Kurt’s were the jocks that kept appearing drained of blood. And really, there’s only been like, _four_. Maybe five. It was hardly worth threatening his life over.

Whichever way she looked at it, what she did on that bridge was unjustified, and now it looked like she had lost a friend. One of the very few people she could actually call a friend. It surprised her to admit it, but the more time she spent away from him, the truer it felt. When she wasn’t accusing him of being a part of the undead, they actually seemed to have fun together.

Rachel had never really experienced something like it. Sure, she had the Glee Club, but she never really felt like she could connect to them apart from a love of music. Yes, Glee was family, and she loved them, but they didn't have much in common. Yet there was Kurt, who shared her passion for Broadway _and_ being better than other people.

And she had let him go. Rather, she had shoved him away.

And now, it was her job to get him back.

/\/\/\/\/\/\

 

“Ok guys, I think it’s about time to start rehearsing for the upcoming competition…” Mr. Shue began. Rachel didn’t have time for this.

“Mr. Shue,” she began, shooting up from her seat. “I appreciate this change of pace, but first I insist to take the stage for a moment. I have some feelings I need to express.”

“Oh Jesus, here we go,” Puck muttered. “Hey, Hummel, any chance you got a time machine that could take us ten minutes into the future? I can’t sit through this.”

Kurt who had been resolutely staring down the ground ever since Rachel began her speech, looked up in confusion. “Why do you keep asking me that?”

Puck looked at him suspiciously. “You’ll spill. One day.”

“Excuse me, Noah, but I believe _I_ have the stage.” Rachel said loudly. “Thank you.”

With the attention brought back to Rachel, she took a deep breath.

“Recently, I said some things that I really regret, and because of it, I lost the trust of a friend. And I just wanted to say, to that friend, that I am sorry. I wasn’t thinking. I know that you would never do that, and I know that I can trust you.”

Rachel saw Kurt raise his head, and for the first time since the incident, actually listen to her. She smiled at him.

“It doesn’t matter to me that you killed all those people either, I mean; it’s on the same moral level as killing animals for food, right? And if I can be friends with people who eat chicken, I should be able to be friends with you."

“That took a weird turn,” Santana said.

Rachel barely heard because at that moment, Kurt smiled back.

She could barely contain her joy as she started to sing.

/\/\/\/\/\/\

 

Rachel smiled as she looked down the river. It wasn’t much, considering it was Ohio, but it was still probably one of the most pleasant views around. The river was shallow, but still rushed along at a furious pace. Each side was lined with trees, and because of the river’s bend, seemed to be never ending. Ignoring the concrete walls that controlled the water, it was almost enough to bring out some fondness for the city.

“You wanted to meet me?”

The voice came out of nowhere, but Rachel wasn’t startled.

She turned to her side to see Kurt casually standing at the end of the bridge.

“Yes, I wanted to make my formal apology for how I treated you.”

“So you chose the place where you did the mistreating?”

She rolled her eyes in annoyance that he didn’t get it. “It’s poetic, Kurt. When I write my autobiography, readers will appreciate how I tie it all together in the end.”

“Or they’ll think you’re crazy because you believe you actually met a vampire, and won’t care about how you tied it together.” Kurt reasoned.

“In my autobiography you will simply be a juvenile delinquent who I save through song,” Rachel replied easily. “Now about that apology…”

Kurt raised his hand. “Please spare your tears. I appreciate the drama, but I think your heartwarming rendition of Kelly Clarkson in Glee was enough,”

“I actually recycled an old glee song for that. Of course I changed the pace and tone, but I still think I owe you another song, something never done before. I didn’t have time to prepare an original Rachel Berry ballad, it was all a bit spur of the moment, but if I had more rehearsal time …”

“Rachel,” Kurt interrupted with a smile. “I assumed you asked me here for something other then ballad discussions.”

“Oh right!” Rachel said. “I actually had a very symbolic way to express my apology, which was why I asked you to meet me here specifically.”

“And that symbolic apology is…?” Kurt prompted.

Rachel smiled, and pulled out the large hard-covered book that was responsible for making the divide between them. Kurt frowned at the sight of it.

“I’m not sure I like where this is going,” he muttered.

“Kurt Hummel,” Rachel interrupted loudly. “To demonstrate the level of trust I employ onto you, despite your undead state, I will destroy this book, therefore destroying one of the best collection of tactics for killing vampires!”

And with a grand gesture, she threw the book over the edge and into the river below.

Satisfied, she made her way over to stand next to Kurt who was standing there in a kind of dumb shock.

“Uh, Rachel?”

“Yes, Kurt?” Here it was, the reunion of two long lost friends! He was going to accept her apology, and together they would take the world by storm! Perhaps they would star in Broadway together? She would see what Kurt wanted. They could work something out. Perhaps that was what he was about to tell her, that they should off to New York at that very moment! But Kurt what would they do about school? Oh, the tragedy of it all!

Instead of any of that, Kurt said in a very flat tone, “You realize that I’m not the only vampire out there right? And a good many of them are very evil. You really shouldn’t have done that.”

“Oh,” Rachel replied, quite shocked. She hadn’t thought of that. They both looked back at the river in shocked silence.

“I’ll just…” She gestured to the river. “…Get that.”

“Right,”

Rachel, who was very glad that she had set up this rendezvous during the day, rather then in the middle of the night where the river would surely be freezing cold, started towards the water. She paused for a moment however, to look back.

“But we’re friends again, right?”

“What? Rachel you need to get the--” Kurt tried to reason, but seeing she was not moving, gave a great sigh. “Yes, we’re friends again. Hallelujah. Now please get the book!”

With a great smile, she replied, “I’ll be back soon.”

This was what led to the two sitting in Kurt’s living room, both clutching hot chocolate, with Rachel newly dry and changed into some of Kurt’s warmest clothes (she really needed to look into investing in some ponchos, they were _fantastic_ ) and ready to begin on Rachel’s Weekly Broadway Classic Re-Watch. She smiled into her cup. She couldn’t think of a better companion for her Re-Watch, and was happy in the knowledge that she finally had a friend who she could share it with.

And she really hoped that the police wouldn’t figure who was behind those body draining’s and that Kurt didn’t have to skip town, because she was starting to really enjoy having him around.

 _fin._  

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading, and please comment so I know what you thought of it!
> 
> If you want to read this through Tumblr, you can find it here: [tumblr link](http://larkofthesky.tumblr.com/post/101432505145/so-to-celebrate-the-spookiest-day-of-the-year-i%22).


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